There are several different dates of birth, but because he abandoned his wife/2 kids, he changed his identity and even "denied knowing his relations when he ran into them."
According to Dutch Reformed Church records Stephen and William were not twins as is purported in most biographies, however, they were baptized on the same day. William was born 4 November 1813 and Stephen was born 27 November 1815. [1]
No source as to why his obit/headstone have "Commodore"
Biography
Pvt Stephen (Bross) Decatur served with the United States of America during the Mexican-American War Service Started: mmm dd, yyyy Unit(s): Service Ended: mmm dd, yyyy
Commodore Stephen (Bross) Decatur served in the United States Civil War. Enlisted: Aug 26, 1864 Mustered out: 1865 Side: USA Regiment(s): Co D 3rd Regiment Colorado Cavalry
Nickname: the "Bloodless Third"
Soldier Details
Name: Stephen D Decatur
Battle Unit Name: 3rd Regiment, Colorado Cavalry
Side: Union
Company: F
Soldier's Rank In: Pvt
Soldier's Rank Out: Pvt
Alternate name:
Film Number: M534 ROLL 1
Plaque Number:
Notes: Battle Unit Note - (100 Days War Side Note - 1864.)
Born to Moses Bross and Jane Winfield in Sussex County, New Jersey
Older brother William, later became Lieutenant Governor of Illinois
William and Stephen roomed together while attending Williams College; William appears in the Junior Class and Stephen appears in the Sophomore Class in the 1836-7 College Catalogue.
1870 Colorado Territory,Clear Creek, Georgetown
Name Stephen Decatur
Occupation: Associate Editor
Age 53
Birth Year (Estimated) 1816-1817
Birthplace New York
Page Number 20
Citing this Record
"was one of the earliest settlers in Nebraska. He was the namesake and one of the incorporators of Decatur, Nebraska, the second-oldest settlement in Nebraska.[4" (wikipedia.com)
Headstone Inscription
Commodore
Stephen Decatur
Died 1888
(There is nothing that says his Family name was BROSS
"United States Census, 1870," database with images, FamilySearch (https://familysearch.org/ark:/61903/1:1:M4L2-XV7 : 12 April 2016), Stephen Decatur, Colorado, United States; citing p. 20, family 208, NARA microfilm publication M593 (Washington D.C.: National Archives and Records Administration, n.d.); FHL microfilm 545,593.
"1836: William & Stephen Decatur Bross to Margaret Bross". Spared and Shared: Old letters spared from obscurity. Retrieved 31 July 2013.
Dutch Reformed Church Records from New York and New Jersey. Holland Society of New York, New York, New York; database and digital images, "U.S., Dutch Reformed Church Records in Selected States, 1639-1989," Ancestry.com Operations, Inc., 2014 Ancestry Record 6961 #300016556: accessed 30 May 2019; citing Holland Society of New York; New York, New York; Deer Park, Book 12.
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B > Bross | D > Decatur > Stephen Decatur (Bross) Decatur
See a long article on Stephen Decatur in the Omaha Daily Herald, 10 June 1888, p. 4.